The following is a quote from XO by Jeffery Deaver. My first reaction was a complicated blend, which is why I wanted to take a chance to write a full blog post on it.
First, I don’t believe it’s fair to downgrade the amount of love between a couple just because they agree or have it easier than another couple who struggles. Love shouldn’t have to be difficult to have value. Is it easier to love someone in richness and health than it is in sickness and financial trouble (sorry, couldn’t get poorer to work in that sentence). Yes. But how do you quantify love?
Two couples have a good life. All four of them are successful (however they choose to define it); neither couple fights though they do not always agree. A natural disaster occurs and both couples lose everything: their jobs, financial security, loved ones, their home and all of their belongings. One of the couple is still together on the other side, the other is not. The struggle did not increase the love between both couples. Does that mean the couple that divorced was less in love than the couple that stayed together?
On the other hand, I agree that working together through struggles can strengthen the relationship between a couple. Is that the same as there being “more love” than there was before the hardship? Is that bond that is strengthened love or friendship? It makes me think of some common relationship advice, “You always love your partner, but you may not always like each other.”
Do you think there’s more love in sweat than laughter?