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abuse, adversity, disgrace, halifax, helping a friend, high school, humanity, life, party, photography, poetry, rape, slut shaming, steubenville, story, survivor, teenagers, victim blaming, writing
WARNING: My post contains sensitive themes (think Steubenville and Halifax[Rehtaeh Parsons]). Some swearing is also included.
I (Ermisenda) need to communicate and express my utter disappointment in our world at the moment with these terrible events. Slut-shaming is NOT okay, victim-blaming is NOT okay. The only REASON for rape is the RAPIST. Not clothes, not alcohol, not the way you talk, or the way you act.
I urge people to join in, comment with your paragraph of fiction to accompany the image. It doesn’t have to follow my story or reflect the same themes. It can be a poem or in a different language (provide a translation please ). Anyone who wants to join in, is welcome. This photograph will be reblogged under Ermisenda on tumblr and added to the Picture it & Write gallery on Facebook and Pinterest.
Please continue to write however you’re inspired, but add a tag to the beginning of your post if there’s mature content in order to keep Picture it & Write an engaging event for all of our followers.
Slam! Someone smashed their hand against a locker, sending a reverberation through the hallway. I flinched, turning my head to investigate. Two 18-year olds boys were harassing a 17-year old girl from my year.
I wasn’t sure what to believe as of late. There had been rumours that last night’s party had lost control. I had been planning to go to this party but ended up opting out. There were too many assignments I wanted to finish.
The boys were whispering, malicious and dirty things were flying from their mouths. I couldn’t quite grasp the words. The girl cowered. People had been talking about some ‘sexy’ stuff that had gone down.
My friend Janine whispered into my ear as we watched, “she was so shit-faced drunk last night. She ended up sleeping with like four different guys. At one point I think she had two guys at once. Such a slut. One of them even had a girlfriend.”
One of the boys ran his fingers down the girl’s back, causing her to move away. This didn’t look like something she was happy about. My blood was beginning to boil.
“What the fuck is your problem? Leave her the fuck alone.” I hoped my generous use of swearing would ward the guys off. I wasn’t a particularly intimidating girl. My hair lay weak and limp on my head, like my arms by my sides.
“She likes it.” One of the boys snickered.
“No, she doesn’t.” I looked over at her, she was averting her eyes.
“I even have photos of her smiling with–“
I grabbed his phone and smashed it against the ground. I wasn’t sure what was coming over me but the anger was too much to contain. Fury flashed behind his eyes. His hand raised suddenly but his friend pulled it back for him.
“Rot in hell,” I spat.
Pulling the girl away, I stormed off in the other direction, ignoring the ‘Whore’ stickers on her locker. Janine, horrified, didn’t follow. Gossiping whispers filled the hallway, boys and girls scrunched their noses at the sight of the girl.
Away from the lockers and beneath a tree in the school yard, I turned her to face me. Tears were streaming down her face. Choking on her tears, she struggled to speak.
“No– No– No-one. I have no-one. And no-one b–believes me.”
“Believes what?” I asked. I was sick of misogynistic guys in my school blaming girls when they didn’t want the responsibility. I hated the bitching disease everyone was adamant on spreading. I hated that promiscuous girls were sluts but guys were studs.
“I d–didn’t know. I was p–passed out. I w–woke up with…my–my clothes…” she broke into uncontrollable sobs.
I had never cared much for this girl. I didn’t even remember her name. Guilt stabbed me in the gut. A living breathing human being was before me, in such suffering and grief, and I couldn’t even utter her name in comfort. I wasn’t sure what to do.
Her phone beeped. I couldn’t help but look at the screen with her. A text message from Sarah, a former friend, stating ‘You shouldn’t have gotten so drunk. Everyone thinks you’re a whore.’
The tears cascaded once more from the girl’s face. I shook my head firmly.
“No,” my voice didn’t waver. “It’s not your fault. They,” I hissed, “shouldn’t have touched you.”
I didn’t care if people could see us. I didn’t care about the rumours that started after. I became the ‘whore’s friend’ and I couldn’t care less. She had been exiled from her peers for a wrong that others had done to her. I had heard the stories on the news. This girl was in danger of committing suicide.
My humanity kicked in, I cared about her. I wanted to get back at these scumbags. Both the perpetrators and the judgmental gossipers. I was about to tell her that she would have to change her phone number. If she wanted to use the internet, she would have to make a new name. That she would have to remove her Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr. But I didn’t do it just now. This crying mess needed something else, something any ostracised person would need.
I reached out and touched her shoulder. She leaped into me with a hug and clung on as if her life depended on it.
– Ermisenda Alvarez
P.S. I hate to think that someone in desperate need of company and humanity has ever crossed Ermilia and was hesitant to talk. I urge anyone who just wants to chat to send me an email or add me on Facebook. You are not alone. I care about you.
Everyone is welcome to use the button, just link them back to the Picture it & write category or Ermiliablog! Share your love for Picture it & write on your blog with the image below. Be proud, and stylish
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Reading this made me cry. You did a beautiful job, Ermisenda. Even if we’re lonely, we’re not alone. Thank you for reaching out. Will plan this week’s picture it and write soon 🙂
I’m glad the emotion I tried to weave into the story came through. 🙂
Some mild profanities. Here is my picture it & write contribution 🙂
http://prisailurophileblog.wordpress.com/2013/04/19/picture-it-write-a-short-story-xi/
I loved how you built the tension. It was very realistic and I loved the Pulp Fiction quote. Bahaha! So worth the profanities warning. She would definitely leave an impression if she was to introduce herself like that. 😛 Thanks for contributing this week to Picture it & write!
This is my contribution. I thought of continuing my previous story. I hope you will like it:
http://edgarsroad.wordpress.com/2013/04/14/different/
I kept reading ‘Ermilia’ instead of ‘Emilia’. Haha! 😀 A quirky story that left me a little bewildered. Thanks for contributing this week to Picture it & write, Ellen! 🙂
I would like to have it Ermilia in honor for both of you but maybe a little too much. I enjoyed this, “picture it & write”. That’s why I am so thankful for this opportunity. 🙂
Bewildered, I got my word right there. Thanks! Looking forward to the next one.
😀 I love the name Emilia anyway. I’m glad you enjoy these exercises as much as we do. 🙂
I didn’t get raped in high school (that didn’t happen until I was an adult) but I did get branded a “slut” by a group of girls who knew nothing about me. There was this one boy who was always grabbing my breasts and butt. I finally gave him a kick where it counts, and he never bothered me again. But there were a lot of rumors about me and I never knew why. I went to parties a lot, but I was a virgin until I was sixteen, and I wasn’t at all promiscuous.
It is such a shame that this happened at all. While I have obviously never understood rape, slut-shaming baffles me. Especially when girls do it to girls. It scares me that there are people who can so easily succumb to that mentality. I’m glad you kicked that guy where it counts! There are plenty of people out there who need it I think. Thanks for sharing your story with us Opal. My love goes out to you. 🙂
Thank you kindly. It has taken me to being almost 50 years old to finally start accepting myself.
Better late than never. One of my favourite quotes is: “To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”-Oscar Wilde 🙂
It is sad that you have experienced that. I sympathize. This world is superficial and judgmental. Insecurities strikes most people around that time ‘high school’. Usually we want to belong, to conform to the society and left out the so-called ‘outcast’. Girls who bad-mouths on the expense of those who they think they can afford to bully are the ones most insecure.
Rape is very brutal. Shaming you as woman is unfathomable. I know someone who confided in me and I was distraught. I saw the permanent effect it had on her. I can only pray for those people who were harmed that they have a peaceful mind.
I was fifteen and a virgin. It’s the sickest thing to say so, but I’ve always regretted not giving in to the stupid groping boys (or girls). I seriously hate myself for thinking it sometimes, but at least I would have different memories than being scared to death with some perverted old man on drugs. I loved Alice Sebold for these words (not sure the exact quote)… “he had done this thing to me and I had lived.” Which of course, Susie Salmon did not, but I did.
Reblogged this on The Cheese Whines.
Thank you for sharing the message!
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Hi there,
Here is my offering for this week
http://joe2stories.wordpress.com/2013/04/14/picture-it-and-write-fallen/
Enjoy
Joe
Oh, Joe! What an amazing piece. I love that you approached this picture from a different angle but the message is just as powerful. I detest bullying so much, and a lot of this bullying is actually criminal activity. I adored this line -“Who’d have thought it was built on sand?” in reference to the friendships. It’s bizarre how exposing one’s sexuality can change people’s views so fast…I never understood it.
Thank you for sharing your amazing writing talent to push this fantastic message with us on Ermilia Blog. 🙂
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Thanks very much..!
Thanks for sharing a cause you feel the need to share. Sometimes I think that we need to make an important post to send the positive message out there. So many terrible things happen, so many good things too. But, as writers and bloggers, hopefully we can help reduce ignorance, increase our humanity, and shape societies views on these important issues. Thanks for enlightening me on the Romani people this week, Pirate.
I wrote an entry here.
I agree with this wholeheartedly, “Anyone who would do this to another person is vermin.”
Absolute vermin. Thanks for sharing my post and by contributing this week with this work. It’s so sad to hear the pain Emi is going through. I hope she is able to pull through and realise that she isn’t a victim, that she is a survivor.
I’m sorry. I can’t read the crazy psychedelic colors. They shut my brain down completely and I can’t make sense of a single sentence. Please don’t be mad at me. I probably just have more wrong with me than I know about.
Hi. I’ve read your post and it tore at my heart. There is a connection here with my blog. When I posted L in the A to Z Challenge I was going to post lawyers. I was scanning the odd bits of news and came upon a story, and then another. They were posted under “Lousy B***ards” You can find it on http://www.tomwisk.wordpress.com The post Tangled Up In A Twist Of Fate 77
Thanks for contributing this week with this post. It addresses some important issues, especially about abortion. I’m glad that I wasn’t the only one outraged by Rehtaeh Parsons and the exposed cases of young girls being not only taken advantage of, but bullied and slut-shamed after.
Out of all of your entries, this one must be my favourite. It’s such a common thing these days and it’s sick. It reminds me strongly of ‘Speak’ by Laurie Halse Anderson. Joe’s piece was great too. Well, I know what I’ll be writing on, and I think it’s time I did something about this topic.
Thanks for the name-drop 🙂 Your piece was very good too.
Thank you, Devina. I really felt connected to this piece as well. I look forward to reading yours!
I can’t pick favorites, but I just used the words, “direct and inspired”. I do love this, Ermi! ♥
♥
Here is my entry for this week. 🙂
http://gotmeghan.wordpress.com/2013/04/14/picture-it-write-ready-for-the-next-step/
When I graduated it didn’t feel like I was graduating. I just thought I would go back to school the next day…but I didn’t. Graduation is a funny thing, so is high school. We spend so many years so close to these people and then poof, it all disappears and all our paths change so suddenly. I felt like your poem encompassed that element of graduation. Thanks for contributing this week, Meghan! 🙂
Here’s my link! http://mythoughtsonthesubjectareasfollows.wordpress.com/2013/04/14/and-then-it-all-changes/
Wow. I love how sudden the change of tone was. From party-times to a nightmare. That’s often how survivors of sexual assault describe the events. A great poem. I only hope that she doesn’t see her future annihilated, that she sees herself as a survivor. She can still have a bright future despite the despicable actions of others. Thanks for contributing this week at Picture it & write and sharing your view, through poetry, on the subject matter! 🙂
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Mine didn’t go into that particular category of abuse but it’s abuse either way, here’s mine: <a href="http://hotchocolateandbooks.wordpress.com/2013/04/14/picture-it-and-write-behind-the-scenes/"Behind the scenes .
Mine didn’t go into that particular category of abuse but it’s abuse either way, here’s mine: Behind the scenes. The other one is a broken link.
I find it fascinating too, that often the people who are most homophobic are homosexual. I often thought it was due to their parents (being homophobic) and although the child was homosexual, they “acted” homophobic to try and convince even themselves? I don’t know. It’s complicated but I liked your story!
I’m glad that she stood up. The witnesses always need to do something. We can’t just stay spectators. One of my favourite quotes state: “The world is a dangerous place. Not because of the people who are evil; but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.” – Albert Einstein. Thanks for contributing this week to Picture it & write! 🙂
I tread these halls;
My history, learnt in time.
I lived these halls;
My hopes, and dreams
Were born here.
I hated these halls;
My life, was a joke.
I loved these halls;
My life, was a joke,
But I was better than it.
I died in these halls;
My world, forever changed.
I haunt these halls;
A piece of me living on
In each of the lockers.
I love the gradual change from “tread these halls, hated these halls, died in these halls” to the eerie present-tense “haunt these halls”. It is tragic to think that there are many young lives that never left high school to venture further. Their last stop in life were the hallways of their high schools before committing suicide. Thanks for sharing this powerful piece with us! 🙂
Its a true shame, and sometimes its something that we forget that there are people who never make it past high school and suffer because of it. Not just in the physical sense but we lose ourselves in High school its where we change and learn who we are so not only is it that its a metaphor of what happens when you go in a young child and come out different, and a part of you stays in the halls of who you once were.
I always feel so hard for people whose children, brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, etc. get so far that suicide feels like the only option. I hope that no one ever has to go through that even though it seems like it’s pervasive. We just have to be diligent and loving beings who are always there by those people who need love.
Thank you for letting me come and share it with you!
I definitely agree about being loving beings. It’s terrible that so many people feel a lack of love. Sometimes, it’s too late before we can do anything about it. So, let us be loving every day. Let us have humanity, to even strangers. We never know what they may be going through and a smile can go a long way!
Well-formed. I hope a dead piece of you wasn’t in each locker!
Haha no! But whenever I return to my highschool I feel as though it sometimes is!
Awesome stuff! You took that to the depths and then the heights. I’m sorry, I won’t post this week 🙂 Your story deserves all the limelight!
Aw, thanks Lee-Anne. I’m glad you liked it. I only hope to lend some kind words to all those who have had to suffer, those who need someone who cares about them, and to remind everyone that the perpetrator is the ONLY person to blame. 🙂
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You’ve written with such humanity and sensitivity at disposal, on a subject that’s been confounding for ages now. Appreciate the way you’ve reached out. It’s time that men and women got together, maybe not as shrieking feminists, but as sentient human beings, and such efforts do go a long way 🙂
I have created something different from the theme. Hope you like it.
http://jotteddots.wordpress.com/2013/04/18/that-other/
Thanks, Miss M. You know, I don’t think it’s a bad thing to be a “shrieking feminist” after all, feminism just means equality amongst the sexes. It saddens me that people shirk away from calling themselves feminists so they don’t come across too “harsh”. I say, to hell with that! Equality is nothing to be afraid of or ashamed of. But I agree with your message. We don’t have to always be screaming how things should be, or thinking big. We should be taking note of the small things we do. The things that affect people around us.
In relation to your story…: A very different approach! I loved this description- ‘She had breached into my mind, many-a-times, rummaging through the compartments – that I had so carefully segregated.’ Beautiful! Thanks for contributing this week to Picture it & write! 🙂 I hope to see more of your stories in the future.
I think you’re right. A lot of talking all this while, hasn’t really helped much! Thank you again for appreciating my post.
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Somewhat morbid story this time? 🙂 http://evilnymphstuff.wordpress.com/2013/04/19/the-most-generous-thing-about-love/
Very powerful! I loved the way you ended it. Love never dies. Usually a romantic idea, but you put a sinister edge to it. Fantastic! Also loved this description – ‘The most dangerous thing about love was that it could deprive you of all your senses, all except the one deep inside of you: that of your heart.’ Thanks for contributing this week to Picture it & write, M. D.! 🙂
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this brought tears to my eyes, beautiful piece of writing, very moving and just so very real. you’ve a great gift of empathy.
Oh, thank you Kz. 🙂 I’m touched by your kind words. I’m just happy that people have connected with this piece. It means a lot to me. Society is very strange and often cruel, and I hope my piece highlights that.
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I loved your post. It touched my heart!
Here is my contribution for this week:
http://shalvikap.wordpress.com/2013/04/20/back-to-school/
We change so much over the course of our lives. But hopefully, we should be happy and proud of every transformation. When you’re 50 you will think back to your 20s and 30s…it’s only natural that during your 20s and 30s you might look back at your teen years. Times change but we have to focus on the present. If not, we’ll spend our whole lives in the past. Thanks for posting this thought-provoking story to Picture it & write! 🙂
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Awesome, Ermi! Perfect venom. So crazy what jerks people can be. My friend who tried to stick up for me this way was labeled a Lesbian for it. Sorry I’m so late getting around to this, and also big hugs for reaching out!
Here’s Combination Block. I though it was weird that I equate lockers with bullying but obviously I’m not alone. Should be interesting catching up!
Thanks for the kind words. I agree, how can people be such jerks? That friend of yours soudns like she was amazing. We just have to know that standing up for our morals during high school is worth the petty names bullies can give us to hide their own insecurities. It can be hard to think past high school though when you’re there. That’s why I love the ‘It gets better’ campaign on Youtube.
I kinda felt bad ‘liking the story’. Love the writing, it just has a sad ending. 😦 Adored this description: ‘Of course all this is thrust upon you with your volatile teenage psyche washed up on the beach by a tsunami of hormones, and pecked there by the hungry gulls of pubescent insecurity.’ Holy crap. What a beautiful string of words and metaphors. You amaze me, Anne! I hope things got better for sweet Flower Anne.
I don’t know old you 2 are. I’m 36. I would just like to say Bravissimo!!! I have recently discovered your blog, mine is not up & running yet. Evil is when people see something wrong happening & do nothing to stop it!!! My brother & I were both appalled & enraged by Steubenville & the many suicides that have happened due to bullying. I have 2 links I would like to share with you, that I will most likely send via facebook, because the content is mature. Peace, hope, love, xx
Thanks for sharing your support, Xandra! I think that Project Unbreakable is fantastic. Thanks for sharing the link on Facebook and people here who would like to see it, it is here: http://project-unbreakable.org/ It does deal with sensitive themes on rape. I send my love out to you too, Xandra! The good people have to do something, not stand by and do nothing.
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